A letter to Lieutenant Joe Cable

Dear Joe,

You've got a great voice. Really, it's lovely. I've got one problem with it though.

The young romantic lead is supposed to be a tenor. Not a baritone. Not a bass. A tenor. When there's multiple male leads, you should be able to tell them apart by their range. Look at virtually every show on the planet, the romantic lead is a tenor. When there's more than one romantic lead, like you and Emil in South Pacific, the young one is a tenor and the old one is a baritone or bass. When there's multiple leads and some are romantic and some aren't, the romantic one is the tenor. Don't ask me why. It's just true. Look at Phantom of the Opera, multiple romantic male leads, like South Pacific. Raoul, the young guy, is a tenor. The Phantom, the old (well, older) guy is a baritone (ok, not so great example 'cause a lot of guys can play both. But the parts are written so Raoul pretty much always sings a bit higher....). Look at Les Mis. Three male leads, Marius, the romantic guy, is a tenor. Javert and Valjean are a) older and b) not romantic, they've got epically awesome baritone-y bass-y parts (since I've never actually had to worry about the difference between a bass and a baritone, being neither, I'm not really clear on what defines the two.... I just know a baritone doesn't go as low... I'm inclined to think it's like the difference between a mezzo and a soprano, but I have no idea....).

You're a young romantic dude. That means you don't get to sing low. I'm sorry. I know it's disappointing. But it's true. I know lower is cooler. Don't get me wrong, you sound awesome. You're the only young romantic male lead I've ever even remotely crushed on (I tend to be indifferent to tenors.... That is when I don't actively dislike them... I'm a sucker for a bass. I mean, Some Enchanted Evening? I'm in heaven. Virtually everything Javert sings? Awesome. But I totally zone out during everything Marius sings....). But you have no business singing so low. I used to never be able to remember if you or Emil sings Younger Than Springtime 'cause you sing it so damn low!!!!

Unfortunately, South Pacific is one of the shows that I've never seen on stage and I don't think I've ever even heard the recording of the stage version (apparently the whole world likes Mitzi Gaynor better than Mary Martin...), so I have no idea if this is your fault or Rodgers and Hammerstein's. I have a sneaking suspicion that it's either their fault or the idiot people casting in the '50s when all the R&H were filmed, since I seem to recall Lunta in the King and I being epically low as well (and also being pretty epic sounding in his lowness...). On the other hand, the Sound of Music gets it right. The Captain is on the lower end and whats-his-face (the one who winds up being a Nazi and has the hots for Liesel. Or is it Liesl?) being annoyingly high in that tenor-like way.

So I'm thinking it's the fault of whoever made the R&H movies about Asians, or at least who ever dealt with who sang what.

Or R&H just randomly decided in two of their shows they'd make the guys who really OUGHT to be tenors be baritones/basses.

Alright. I'm sorry. It was unfair of me to blame you. But you are an easy target. Remember, I'd totally avoid you if you sang higher..........

Sincerely, Wendy

Window shopping online is depressing

I've done this both with shoes and vacation spots. It's all depressing.

See, first I went and added about a million shoes to my Zappos wishlist. A lot of fantastically cute shoes that I can totally see Ginger Rogers dancing in. Or maybe Rose Marie wearing in the Dick Van Dyke Show. Seriously, has anyone ever noticed how fabulous her shoes are?? Mary Tyler Moore is always just in pumps. Rose Marie has fantastic shoes.

Anyway. So then I was all, let's plan a dream vacation on Expedia! But I couldn't make the website do what I wanted. I kept thinking it was actually gonna book me and I didn't really want that.

But just now I was reading [The Customer Is] Not Always Right and there's a lot of posts there from people in New Zealand, and a lot of time they talk about the Maori people. Being the occasionally naive American (I always forget that Australia and New Zealand were populated before the Brits started sending convicts there....), I was intrigued (hey, that shows my naivete is only occasional. I admit that I don't know everything and I try to learn. See? Really naive Americans either don't realize there's anything beyond our borders or think everything outside our borders is actually within our borders....). Wanting to know more about the Maori, I went to my favorite "won't teach you anything but will give you a little context/background for it" source: Wikipedia.

Wikipedia explained that the Maori were Polynesians who went to a different part of the South Pacific. I'm not sure if they left the Hawaii area or got separated from the ones who wound up in Hawaii. Either way, besides a lot of evolution, their culture is closest to Hawaiian/Polynesian type cultures.

Well, this reminded me of the Polynesian Resort in Disney World, which is where we used to stay. When I was little, my family went to Disney World pretty much every year during Christmas vacation (actually, I have no idea how often it was. I remember a lot of things as being every year that actually were a lot more occasional.... Or like how I remember my "uncle" Scotty [surrogate uncle. Mom's college friend. Practically full time babysitter. At least in my memory.] picking me up from kindergarten every day. My mother tells me it was more like once a week.) and while I'm sure we didn't always stay there, I don't remember staying anywhere else.

Anyway, I've always thought that when I discover some way to fund a trip to Disney World (yeah right), that's where I wanna stay.

So not gonna happen. During the "value season" the cheapest room is $385. And it doesn't look like that even includes continental breakfast, which means 3 meals a day on top of that, plus park admission, plus any kind of nightlife stuff (my parents used to go to the Adventurers Club and occasionally take us... That was awesome...)...

So I'm thinking when I go and take a vacation sans parents, it'll have to be to Vegas. You can stay in The Venetian, which is a far from lousy hotel, for $149. Plus in Vegas there's always the chance of coming out on top...

Although considering all you can do at 19 is scratch tickets, I'm not expecting much right now. But I do have a 21st birthday in a year and a half and it's never too early to start planning....

And no, I don't just wanna stay at the Venetian because that's where Phantom is. Added bonus.

'Course the downside to all this is my 21st birthday is gonna be a Wednesday, probably the first week back to class second semester. And going three hours west (time zone wise) is not really a great idea for a weekend. I mean, if you're gonna mess with your sleep, you might as well be gone long enough for it to make a difference.

Which means my 21st birthday trip (pardon me. 21st birthday DREAM trip.... Well, sort of dream. Is it bad that a part of me would rather Disney than Vegas for my 21st birthday?) won't be able to happen properly till March when I'll have a vacation....

'Course this is assuming I somehow have the means to go to Vegas. Or Orlando. Which honestly is unlikely.

See? This is the problem with online window shopping!!! I wind up thinking things through too much and being like, hey! I could do that! If I weren't in college and had a really awesome job with a really good salary that gave me really long weekends......

So, the moral of the story is: anyone wanna go to Disney World with me and front the cash for an epically fabulous hotel?? Oooh, and we should totally go to a character breakfast. I don't care where it is, they have them in the Polynesian and the Grand Floridian (well, ok, they did 10 years ago. I assume they still do.) and they have character lunches (maybe other meals too... I dunno...) in Cinderella's Castle. Which is where Peter Pan offered to teach me to fly when I was, like, 4. I don't actually remember that. Although I do remember him sitting on the back of a chair.

Sigh. Someday I'll be rich and famous and be able to spend two weeks in a super fantastic room at the Polynesian. Maybe.

That's the goal, anyway.

This is the girl who has never seen a show on Broadway

If you have read more than, like, three of my posts, you know that I'm really into Broadway/West End shows. To quote my wonderful customs people (kind of like orientation leaders... Bryn Mawr is cooler than other schools so we call them customs people because they teach us the customs... At least, I think that's why we call them that... They have nothing to do with bringing things in and out of the country or passports, and that's the only other definition of "customs" I can think of, so I think I'm right...), I am a "Broadway aficionado."

So here's something interesting.

I've never seen a show on Broadway.

Actually, I've never even BEEN to New York. I've driven through. I've taken the train through. I've even hung out in Penn Station for half an hour waiting for the next train.

But until a year and a half ago, I'd never even SPOKEN in New York City. My dad had a quiet rule for driving through the city when I was little. I think the first time I broke this rule (unless you count the time one of my brothers and I were really into maps and we thought we were helping Dad navigate...) was when Dad and I went to visit Bryn Mawr the second time, in October 2009. It was just the two of us in the car and there wasn't any traffic, so Daddy didn't mind me talking.

I've seen plenty of shows. I've seen six shows in Boston: Peter Pan (check out this post to hear about it), the Boyfriend, Rent, Wicked, Rent (again), and A Chorus Line. Plus lots of Gilbert and Sullivan in some college theater (I think? I don't know exactly...) my grandparents used to take us to all the time. And I saw Les Miserablés at the North Shore Music Theater. And bunch of amateur, community theater, and school shows.

And I've seen things in London. The Woman in White, Mary Poppins (I didn't know it at the time, but I actually saw the original cast. Which is very exciting for me...), Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, Wicked, and Phantom of the Opera (same post as Peter Pan above...).

That's a grand total of 11 professional performances (although only 9 shows) and plenty of nearly professional performances (North Shore is pretty close to being professional, I think. As was the Gilbert and Sullivan stuff.).

And I'm going to see West Side Story in Boston this summer.

But I've never seen anything in New York. Me. The girl who could perform nearly all of these shows by herself. I don't think I could do Mary Poppins or Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, and I might lose some lyrics in A Chorus Line, and I don't think I've been able to do Peter Pan in years (Although I could definitely still get the gist of most of the songs. I'll just swap verses and things...), but the rest of them?

I could perform all of them pretty much start to finish. And that includes switching between characters when multiple characters sing different parts simultaneously. Like, the end of Phantom when Christine, Raoul, and the Phantom are all singing together? I know all of Christine's and the Phantom's and most of Raoul's. And know all the best places to swap between them for the best effect.

So. My goal for college, besides the surviving and graduating thing, is to spend a night in New York and see something on Broadway. Preferably something I'm madly in love with. And it'd rock if any of my favorite actors are performing. Although I realize that the chances of seeing Richard Harris AND Julie Andrews in Camelot are less than nil.

It can't be that hard, can it? I mean, any time I go back and forth to school on the ground, whether train or car, I have to go through NYC. Surely at some point I can arrange it...

*Cough cough* *This is my hint to my parents that sometime we should take an extra day or two when you're driving me here/home and we should break the drive into two days and spend the extra evening in NYC. Just saying.*

*Wait. Is it too late to arrange that for the drive home in a week and a half? I mean, we were debating between Daddy coming down on Tuesday or Wednesday anyway... What's to stop us getting home Thursday??*

Ok. My oh so subtle suggestion to my parents is done now.

The Phantom's Bad Luck

If you haven't seen the Phantom of the Opera movie and are not interested in spoilers, don't read this. I'm writing this as though you've seen either the movie or the show. I'm just kind of referencing things....

At the end of the Phantom of the Opera movie, the Phantom (Gerard Butler) smashed all his mirrors. He has three mirrors, he smashes them each twice. The final smash shatters the last mirror completely.

Let's give the Phantom 7 years bad luck for each smashing and an extra 7 years for that final smash (especially since there's a bit of a continuity issue with that mirror. He smashes it once and the camera zooms in and you see two spidery places where he hit it.... So let's count the incontinuity and utter shatterage as a third hit on the final mirror.). Two smashing per 3 mirrors plus the extra one. That's 7 sets of bad luck. 7 sets of 7 years of bad luck is 49 years.

Now, the black and white bits of the movie are set in Paris 1919. The colored story (which is technically a flash back. Although I'm pretty sure there's a fancy word I can't remember for when the entire story is set in flash back...) is set in Paris 1870. That's 49 years later.

So... 49 years after the events of the story, the Phantom leaves a rose with Christine's ring on the ribbon tied around it on Christine's grave.

I wonder if the movie people did this on purpose. Like, his bad luck has finally run out and he leaves the ring and rose on her grave?

'Course, if you think about Love Never Dies, this means absolutely nothing since other than loneliness the Phantom has pretty decent luck... But (if I recall correctly... I've only seen it on stage once and it was two years ago....) he also doesn't smash mirrors on stage....

My Favorite Show

You could say my childhood was defined by musicals: Peter Pan, Fiddler on the Roof, Sound of Music, the King and I, My Fair Lady, the Music Man... The list is pretty long, but figure it's mostly Rogers and Hammerstein, a little Lerner and Lowe, and generally "classic" stuff. In other words, all stuff my mother loves.

Especially when I was little, my siblings and I were all really into Peter Pan. I had an obvious reason, but I don't know what the pull was for my siblings. The point is, we all loved it.

When I was maybe 6, my whole family went to see Cathy Rigby in Peter Pan in Boston. We had seats right at the front of some balcony. I don't know which one, I just remember feeling like we were really far back, so part of me thinks it wasn't the mezzanine. Either way, I should probably mention here that the beginning of this story is about my brother, not me.

My brother was about 3 at this point. He knew the show, but I guess he didn't know what to expect. My mother watching him says that as the overture started, he levitated to the front of his seat. He sat up perfectly straight and you could tell he suddenly knew what he was there for.

Now comes my part of the story, just remember the whole levitating-straight-up–to–the–front-of-the-seat thing.

My junior year of high school, I went to see Phantom of the Opera in London. I'd never seen it on stage before and haven't seen it since.

Before this, I never really had a favorite musical. At this point, I considered Phantom and Les Mis to be among my favorites, by I wouldn't have picked one.

Phantom of the Opera starts very slowly, both on stage and screen, because it has a prologue before the overture. There's an auction and the last item the audience sees auctioned off is the chandelier sitting on the stage. The auctioneer says, "This is the very chandelier which figures in the famous disaster." He goes on about lighting for a bit and finally says, "Perhaps we can frighten away the ghost of so many years ago with a little illumination! Gentlemen!"**

Then the chandelier starts lighting up and lifting off the stage as the overture starts and the scene rewinds to the height of the Paris Opera House (by the way, this sequence is really cool in the movie....).

At the age of 17, I sat on one side of Her Majesty's Theatre in London on some random balcony watching the auction (My seat kind of sucked actually. But it was totally worth it.). As the auctioneer said, "Gentlemen!" I sat straight up. I moved to the edge of my seat. I was utterly transfixed on the chandelier now rising off the stage and the big awesome "duhm duh duh duh duh duh duduh..." (sing it, it's totally the tune...)

I had the same response as my three year old brother.

Now, I'm not saying that Peter Pan was Teddy's favorite show (although it might have been...), but suddenly, when I realized the reaction I had had, I realized I was kidding myself. I love Les Mis, really I do. And I love all the other shows I considered among my favorites. But I suddenly realized I do have a favorite show. And that show is Phantom of the Opera.

I'm not the only one with this reaction to the chandelier.

Last October, the production of Phantom in London celebrated its 10,000th performance and its 24th birthday. In honor of the occasion, Andrew Lloyd Webber and Michael Crawford joined the cast for curtain call (by the way, if you don't care about the whole video, ALW comes on at about 1:30 [technically it's later, but the orchestra does something totally fitting for his entrance, so just start there....], Michael Crawford comes on at 3:40, and he says what I'm talking about at about 4:42):



Ok, so maybe Mr. Crawford's reaction doesn't mean it's his favorite show. But I had the same reaction to something as Michael Crawford!!!!! That's really exciting for me... He's one of my idols. He's amazing and awesome....

As for the rest of watching the show in London, the guy who I saw playing the Phantom was Ramin Karimloo. That's the guy who, less than a year later, would originate the same role in Love Never Dies.

Wait, does that count as originating the role? I mean, he's not originating the character, but he's the first person ever to play that part.... Huh... Confusing...

I haven't seen Phantom since then, other than the movie and lots and lots of YouTube (both of it and LND), but I can still feel like I'm sitting in that seat. I can still feel like I'm there. My reaction when the chandelier went up only scratches the surface of how I responded to finally watching the show on stage.

**These lines are from Phantom of the Opera but may not be exactly word for word the lines. I am remembering them and writing them as I remember. I am also punctuating them as I see fit.

My inspiration

Lately, I've been writing a lot of really long statuses (stati?) on Facebook. Unfortunately, there's a 420 character limit. So I publish them as notes... But really, that doesn't do them justice 'cause I know I don't read notes that show up on my news feed and writing notes is the most boring thing in the world. Well, ok, there are more boring things, but you get the picture. My point is, while I doubt I'm making the reading of my lovely thoughts LESS likely, I could make it MORE likely AND have more fun writing them. So, I'm switching venues.

This is the note that inspired my new venue, copy and pasted straight from FB:

OHMYGODWILLINEVERLEARN. Note to self: if you spend too much time watching videos on YouTube of Andrew Lloyd Webber creations, doesn't seem to matter the show or what's actually in the video (reviews, interviews, actual performance, whatever...), you will wind up reconsidering your life plans. You will likely forget your previous decision that show business probably wouldn't work out for you. The same thing goes for listening to the songs. Those tend to be limited to just Phantom, Love Never Dies (but only as a stand alone... Still can't make an opinion as a sequel...), and the Woman in White. But it doesn't matter what songs. Even the songs I would never sing in my little fantasies. Seriously, I'm not gonna sing Music of the Night, Til I Hear You Sing, or Evermore Without You or I Believe My Heart (that one is slightly more likely... But I think I probably more of a Marian than Laura.... Plus than I can be all dramatic and "IIIIIIII close my eyes and I still see his face......" [and if you know the part I'm talking about, which I doubt you do, you'll know that I actually just wrote that PERFECTLY considering how it gets sung...]). So why do these songs make me go all "West End, here I come!!" And wait, since when did I decide I wanted the West End and not Broadway? I thought I wanted to be a lawyer in New England? Why do I want to move across the pond??? Being Christine and/or Marian. Why do I want to be these women? The arias. Right. I want to sing Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again, All For Laura, If Not For Me For Her, and Love Never Dies. And not just like perform them, but in character. I don't know why. Just do. And with a voice teacher I *think* I could. There have been times when I had all the relevant notes.... But no... I doubt I will ever learn....

Oh, and wanna know the worst part? This was brought on by a musical theater star who I THOUGHT was safe. I was looking at Idina Menzel's website and outside of a random dream I had a gajillion years ago, she's never been in an ALW (She was Madame Giry. Really not sure she'd make a good one, but it was a dream...), so she shouldn't make me go all "yay show business!!!"... But then I was curious about the London Wicked 'cause it say the Apollo Theater. I was like, wait, isn't that where LND is playing? So I kept clicking and found myself on a "Theatreland" website, scrolled through the shows and realized no, it's the ADELPHI... But by then I was on the official LND website watching videos.......